there is a moment

There is a moment sometimes when you have to remind yourself how lucky you are. What happiness looks like. There is a moment on a Friday night, late; not late as in past your bedtime, but late as in too late to be starting dinner only now. You’ve been out, the two of you and the dog, down the park and so a one hour walk easily becomes two after you’ve got there and back and stopped to chat to the friends you’ve made since you got the dog. And what is it really to you? One hour late to dinner on a Friday night with no one but the two of you please and the whole weekend stretching out in front of you like a promise.

The moment is like this: the two of you standing back to back, cramped together in the kitchen, you chopping vegetables, your girlfriend washing up. The dog snuffling round at your feet looking for dropped bits of food and the occasional pat on the head. You told the Google thing that sits on the shelf to play some music and Harry Styles bursts forth. Your girlfriend swings out from the sink to sing a line in your face to make you laugh. You swivel round in the midst of the chopped carrots to kiss her shoulders until she giggles and shoves you off. It’s just a moment. A normal one at the end of a busy week but which once might have felt impossible.

Maybe it’s the one beer you drank while cooking, maybe it’s the onions, maybe it’s just everything. But your eyes fill with tears. Just for a moment.