all the rooms in my flat rated out of ten


all the rooms in my flat rated out of ten because I haven't been outside in a while

the hallway
slim, yet functional. Leads up to the stairs neatly. The water turn off tap thingy for us and next door is underneath the floorboards here so that seems important, but the hooks I stuck up are always falling off it so it gets knocked down a peg or two (sorry) for that. Also the door lets the dead leaves blow in which is irritating 4/10

the corridor
connects all the rooms in the flat, has a little step up to the living room which I tripped on one time. The only thing it is good for is collecting dust. Fine I guess? 3/10

the living room
okay here's the good stuff. Holds the TV, Nintendo Switch, Playstation, Internet Router AND the books. Plus the sofa and the coffee table that I always dreamed about having coffee table books on that we would never actually look at but that guest might one day remark ohhhhh I see you've been to xyz exhibition. Let's be honest this is obviously the best room in the house. Gets all the good light in the evening 11/10

the spare room or "my office"
the descriptor of this room is well up for debate, is it my office? Jackie's walk-in-wardrobe? the craft-room or the dumping ground? the answer is, of course, all of these things (and more!) I finally have that one miscellaneous drawer where I keep tape, mints, batteries, my broken watch and old lanyards I should have thrown away. Also "Basil" my basil plant lives here and my beloved anglepoise lamp that my uni housemate rescued for me out of skip behind his art school. Main home to my laptop and writing meltdowns 7/10

the kitchen
she's beauty, she grace, she's where I go to stuff my face. I love our little kitchen and it's drawers which have that mechanism that lets you slam them shut but then just before they stop themselves and close quietly. Hours of fun. The hob though is a devil woman. Who thought a touch-activated induction hob was a good idea? Sometimes it likes to turn itself off halfway through cooking and to turn it back on you have to hold your finger over a burning spot on the top. Every time I pull out our two tubs of spices I think about spending an afternoon labelling them all and then I never do it. Nearly all the food in the house is stored here so for that reason 9/10

the bathroom
was brand new when we moved in and so every tiny bit of dirt and decay has been caused by us and us alone which is quite a heavy burden to bear. Jackie rearranged the cupboards last weekend so now all the medicines are beautifully lined up. There is some method to which items out on the cabinet go in the tray (e.g. toothpaste/toothbrushes) and which don't (e.g. face creams) but I always forget which is which 6/10

the bedroom
thus far I've only flashed the neighbours once during the current pandemic which is good going I think. We bought the wrong part for the Ikea wardrobe we got so that the rail sticks out slightly but I've decided it gives it a bit more personality than if it was straight off the shelf. I wonder daily about it toppling over because we didn't screw it to the wall and only shoved bits of cardboard beneath it. I have one bedside drawer that is still mysteriously empty even 6 months after we've moved in. Jackie's memory form mattress topper is a ~literal dream to sleep on 8/10

the garden
i've never actually been into our garden which I know is ridiculous when people are desperate for outside space in these uncertain times. We share half with downstairs and so far they've had the run of the place (in a nice way they are growing vegetables and feeding the birds). I texted them a week ago asking if we could put out our garden furniture and they quickly said yes but we still haven't done it and now it feels like we've left it too long and they must think we're weird, am I overthinking this maybe? Looks nice from the inside anyway ?/10

I feel very lucky to a) live in a multi-room flat with my gf so we both have somewhere to escape to b) have job security and to be renting off friends c) a garden even though we haven't used it yet - thank you to Thomas Courtenay Warner for building decent social housing in London in the 1900s !


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